From everyone’s favorite All-American, LSUFreek.

w t f ?!

Apparently Rick Neuheisel’s pact with Satan is still in effect as gutty little Bruins edged out Tennessee in overtime.

I work with a Volunteer fan; he didn’t even know who Tennessee was opening up against. I, being a fan of all-things bad that can happen to Rick Neuheisel, cheerfully pointed out that Tennessee would be playing UCLA at Westwood. UCLA, of course, has had their off-season woes and I assured my co-worker that Tennesse should be able to walkout of LA with a win.

Yah, that pretty much shows what I know.

If this is what Norm Chow and Ricky Neuheisel can do with a thrid-string quarterback, USC had better watch-out when UCLA actually gets their first-stringers healthy.

Pelini Maximus!

Consider us entertained!

Some posters over at the Huskerboard are thinking that Nebraska should be ranked. If you are also thinking that, please put down the koolaid and walk it off for a bit. Seriously.

Nebraska beat a MAC team. No disrespect to the MAC (some of my favorite coach are in the MAC), but it’s still the MAC and most Big XII teams are expected to beat teams from this confernece. Unless you’re Baylor.

Sorry, Baylor: we’ve just come to expect (heck, we anticipate!) that you’re gonna lose. In fact when people tell me that Baylor wins, it’s like I’m being setup for a punchline or something.

Not to go to far off of the tangent here, but could someone PLEASE explain to me why Baylor is in the Big XII? Why not TCU? Or Rice? Heck, why not SMU? They were crippled after the death penalty and you’d have to be watch them like a hawk to keep them on the straight and narrow, but at least the Mustangs have had a tradition for winning with National Championships to back up the claim.

Baylor? You’re just taking up room that could have gone to another team. ANY other team.

…

God, it sucks to be you.

And don’t EVEN get me started about Texas A&M.

It’s not as serious as, say, starting quarterback Mark Sanchez’s dislocated kneecap, but the USC Trojans are suffering a new rash of injuries.

Emphasis on rash.

According to a report in the Los Angeles Times, as much as 25% of the team has been affected by a run of tinea cruris, known more colloquially as “jock itch.”

That’s right: jock itch. Not veneral disease, USC haters, so just stop saying that right now.

And let’s make no mistake: crotch fires are never funny. Never. Never ever. When your man-timber is alight like the Burning Man after a week of partying at Black Rock, that’s nothing to joke about.

You’ll forgive tailback Joe McKnight and wide receiver Travon Patterson if they aren’t laughing. Both were unable to practice Wednesday because of the severity of the irritation.

“It burns,” Patterson said.

Which is kind of a misquote. Patterson actually said…

“IT BURNS!!11!1!!“

Patterson said.

Just so as we’re clear. Sorry, guys: it sucks to be you right now.

“I want to show you something,” Jamrog said. “What do you think?”

He showed me a list of college football schools. Most of them were Bowl Championship Series members, some were from the Mountain West or Mid-American conferences. Some were highlighted. Some were crossed out.

Jamrog has been fishing for future NU nonconference opponents. This was his pool. I was somewhat stunned when he asked me to grab a fishing rod.

“Who would you like to see us play?” he asked.

Breakout the wish list, kiddies! What’s one of the first teams that Shatel suggests?

The obvious one is Miami. Yes, the power formerly known as the Hurricanes. The green and orange, in downtown Lincoln. Finally, after all these years.

“We’re working on it,” Jamrog said. “It’s a possibility.”

So. Freaking. A W E S O M E.

Why, do you ask? Oh, no particular reason. None at all.

Right now, Miami is rebuilding. Odds are good that if a deal is hammered-out, by the time they get to Lincoln they’ll be national contenders again. And hopefully, if Coach Pelini’s plans come together, so will Nebraska.

Sweet.

Somewhere, a young lad named Orson Swindle cowers in fear.

Apparently, Lil’ Red has a MySpace page. Who knew? Who’s part of Lil’ Red’s network? Well, Herbie Husker is part his group (duh!). And Zac Taylor, too.

Zac Taylor was one heck of a quarterback and I’m sure he’s one heck of a nice guy. That being said, his MySpace page is… well, it’s a mess.

Seriously, Zac: “Pimp-My-Profie” isn’t exactly a brokerage of good-taste.

But then again, neither is MySpace.*

*And yes, I’m quite aware of the hypocrisy of wordpress user slamming another page about “style.” But it is the internet and hypocrisy is one of the things that fuel the web. That and porn.

Is it just me or does this feel like 1995 again?

If Husker faithful were afraid that Coach Ron Brown’s absence from the came might have dulled his competive spirit, the Life in the Red blog tells you to think again…

As Nebraska pushes through week two of preseason camp, the many visitors attending Husker practices seem to always be taken by tight ends coach Ron Brown’s aggressive and intense on-field approach to his job.

“We don’t run out of bounds at Nebraska!” he shouted toward one of his players the other day.

Awesome. Completely frickin’ awesome!

Quoteth the Brown…

“I’ve done this enough to where I know that every day is a big day,” Brown said after Monday’s practice. “I don’t skip too far ahead. I skip to the next day. But that’s as far ahead as I get. I’ve got young tight ends*, and so it’s a process that’s developmental.

“Not only one day, but one play at a time.”

You have to remember that Ron Brown isn’t here just because of Osborne is back. Bo Pelini said straight-up he’d hire Coach Brown if he became head coach. And if you haven’t figured it out yet, Bo Pelini means what he says and says what he means.

Everyone says how the defense is gonna be all fired-up this season, but don’t discount Nebraska’s offense: sounds like their gonna be laying the smack down, too.

And in case you’re wondering, he still has his ministry.

*Any jokes about Coach Brown working his “young tight ends” will make Baby Jesus cry. Seriously, guys: not cool.

"... to crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of the women..!"

Week one is done and NE Statepaper.com has the wrap-up here. This is what we know so far…

• Practices under Head Coach Bo Pelini are more “intense and run longer”. I guess that means the “slap ‘n tickle” era of Bill Calahan is over.
• Coach Ron Brown is officially back in form and molding the Tight Ends into an elite team of stone-cold killers (or as close to stone-cold as Brothers-in-Christ with the love of God in their hearts can get, I guess). We missed you, Coach Brown!
• Coach Brown is loud, but apparently Coach Mike Ekeler is giving him a run for the money. I personally hope occasionally Coach Ekeler sounds like Carl Spackler because that would be awesome!
• Ty Steinkuhler looks like he’s still having issues. Here’s hoping he gets better.
• Strong safety Major Culbert is doing very well according to on-field reports. How well? Word is he may make colonel some time this season.
• Adi Kunalic looks he’s on the way to becoming designated kickoff man. This kid has a leg with power that can best be described as “stupid” and had to have the ball placed on the 30-yard-line to keep it in the stadium. Kunalic has been working on ball control. He’s also been trying to keep the ball in the Earth’s atmosphere so it doesn’t burning-up on re-entry, which is always nice.
• And what of plucky Joe Ganz, everyone’s favorite for starting quarterback? Sam McKewon says to expect a streaky passer, but that he looks far more comfortable out of the shotgun formation than Taylor or Keller ever did.
• Offensive Coordinator Shawn Watson hints that the #2 quarterback right now may be Patrick Witt. It’s reported that Zac Lee has a good arm but he’s still working on mechanics right now. Additionally, it sounds like Witt has a better grasp on the playbook. Regardless, Nebraska is bless with depth in way of quarterbacks and having a corps of competent play callers has to be a good thing.
• Lucky or Helu? or will it be Helu or Lucky? Young Mister Quentin Castille has had a fine week, thank you very much. Again, depth is never a bad thing. And depth with good players is a very good thing.

By and large, good things from the offense.

Defense?

Ty Steinkuhler not being at 100% does not bode well as the defense will need as much experience as possible, though it sounds like the Pelinis (Bo and Carl) are having quite a bit of success getting their defensive schemes across to the kids. Phillip Dillard in particular seems to really be enjoying himself right now.

Culbert is having a good camp in addition to senior Armando Murillo. According to Coach Marvin Sanders, Murillo has a good head for the game. And if Ty’s brother Baker is as talented as they say, he may well see some playing time also. Baker Steinkulher’s number is 55. Significant? Whether that’s by accident or design, I don’t know.

I just know that the college football season is around the corner and it can’t come soon enough.

Pelini to the press: "What am I supposed to tell, you clowns? THIS IS ONLY DAY FOUR!"

Slow day for Husker news? Why, yes… yes, it is.

From the Lincoln Journal Star’s A Life in the Red blog…

With Day 4 of fall camp in the books, Husker head coach Bo Pelini seemed pleased at the pace of his team’s progress with the opener just more than three weeks away.

“I like the attitude and the work,” Pelini said after his team worked out Thursday on the grass in half pads.

“Obviously, you get a couple days in, you hope that guys aren’t feeling sorry for themselves. I’m sure they are a little bit, but they don’t show it out on the field. They’re running, they’re hustling. I like where they are right now.”

Nothing earthshaking, really. Boilerplate stuff when you get down to it. But from all the reports we are hearing from Lincoln, it sounds like things are gelling quite nicely. All I’m hoping for is a defense what is able to, y’know, TACKLE people.

That would be SUPER!

In news isn’t Husker related per se, but still Big XII…

Despite an unimpressive record through two seasons, Kansas State coach Ron Prince signed a new, five-year contract on Thursday afternoon.

The Kansas City Star reports that the contract is good through the 2012 season. The salary figures were not immediately made public.

Well, now, that is good news… if you’re not a K-State fan.

Sure, Texas fans will talk-up the mad coaching skills of Prince but that still doesn’t explain how the Huskers absolutely pimp-slapped the Wildcats last year.

And no, I’m still not bitter about how Prince snatched Freeman from Nebraska back in ’05.

Mostly.

…

Whatever.

The thing is, I just don’t see why K-State’s Powers-that-be think Prince is all that and a bag of chips. I guess it’s gonna take more season of mediocity for K-State fans to wake-up and smell the suck.

Prediction: when the Ron Prince era comes to its ignominious (look that word up, K-State fans!) end and IF Nebraska really turns it around in the next few years, Kansas State will come sniffing around for Coach Mike Ekeler to take over their program.

What Pelini was to Pete Carrol is what Ekeler is to Pelini. Trust me on this, kids: Ekeler is gonna be the next big assistant that everyone is going to be whispering about when a head coaching job comes down the pike. Besides, Ekeler is K-State alumni and a former team captain.

But that’s all cart before the horse stuff. Time will tell.

Back to Prince. The article mentioned that he’s one of the lowest paid HC’s in the Big XII. But they didn’t point-out Coach Prince’s unlimited access to power towels.

It sucks to be you K-State. I’m just sayin’.

Here’s a guy who, last August, was being talked about by some as a backup. In 2008. For Blaine Gabbert. The trust level in Ganz registered at zero. “Don’t screw up” could have been his calling card.

The reported duel he had with Sam Keller for the starting job was, to many, the definition of a formality. He wasn’t tall enough, although Ganz is every millimeter of his 6-foot-1 frame. His arm wasn’t strong enough, although he threw a better deep ball than Keller. He couldn’t make the big play, although Ganz was more mobile, and capable of creating something out of nothing.

I’ll admit it: I didn’t believe Joe was the man. I often said that “nobody… and I mean NOBODY… holds a clipboard like Joey Ganz!”

So I was the first person at the buffet to get my very large helping of crow when he started to light it up for his final three games last season.

Then Keller got hurt, Gabbert decommitted, and there was Ganz, throwing darts against Kansas, Kansas State and Colorado like a mad fool, doubling his career attempts in one half at KU, setting the team record for yards (510) and touchdowns (7) vs. Kansas State. Ganz consistently located Purify in those three starts and consistently attacked the deep middle of the field. He threw a pretty fade and the post route on a beeline. And, of course, he could roll out, move the pocket, create passing lanes.

All the talk about Joe being competitive with Sam Keller wasn’t taken seriously. No-one could believe that Ganz could do the job. That’s cool with him, though.

[...] Joe Ganz (1,435 yards, 16 touchdowns and 7 interceptions in 2007). Don’t let a 58 percent completion rate fool you; each completion was worth 16.1 yards. Offensive coordinator Shawn Watson isn’t going to expose his quarterback quite that much, but No. 12 is not afraid to trust his receivers. Ganz will probably throw some interceptions. To get the big rewards, you have to risk a little. His primary job is the limit the back-breakers – picks inside the red zone or those returned for touchdowns.

I’m hoping that the dark horse gets into the winner’s circle this year.

GO JOE!